A Greater Meaning

Dear Conor and Colin,

Sometimes a picture says a thousand words and those words might be  expressive, literal, figurative or meaningless.  During your birth Colin, there were many pictures captured but one holds my heart.

This is a picture of your brother cutting your umbilical cord.  Once the cut was complete you were an individual; you no longer relied on me for your life.  Your blood started pumping of its own accord and your lungs were your only source of oxygen. 

Now, many people might have picture of Dad's cutting cords but this picture is different from those.  This picture says more than just "welcome to the world".  This picture says things that may never have a place being said outloud to anyone.  Because of this, I am writing them down for you boys to forever know how special your relationship is & how special you each are to me.

Colin, Conor will always take care of you.  He is your protector, your friend, your brother.  He will make certain you are always safe, warm, loved, and given the chance to be who you want to be.  He will not require you to walk in his shadow but will step aside when needed to give you room to grow and spread your wings.  However, he will be quick to put you in your place if you stray in the wrong direction.

Conor, Colin will forever look up to you.  He will want to mimic your actions, words, and beliefs - so proceed with caution but not so much caution that you hold back who you are and who you were meant to be.  Colin will be your sounding board, your protector, and your scapegoat - just don't get him into too much trouble please.

I am your mom.  And this picture says to me how lucky I am to have two loving sons.  Two boys who will see each other through the best and worst of time.  Who will potentially serve as the others best man at their respective weddings, who will comfort the other when times of sadness and hurt surface, and who will jest and cheer the other on when the time is right.  I love you both so very much and this picture captures the moment when one (Mommy & Colin) became two; but when two (Conor & Colin) also became one.....and together we are a team of three. 

First Glance

First Hug

Mommy and her Loves!

I love you boys!

xoxo
Mommy

PS.  Grandma Mary is also in this picture (that's her red fingernail) and so this picture also captures three generations bringing a new individual into the world.

A Wedding for Apple (and Auntie)! 7.13.13

Dear Apple,

You are already following in your big brother's footsteps by attending your first wedding while still in the womb!  Your Auntie C got married on July 13, 2013 and we were lucky enough to be apart of her special day.

The day started off with some spa treatment - hair and makeup for the entire bridal party.

It was really early and clearly we all needed some help getting pretty for the BIG day and all the pictures that would come.  After getting made up it was time to go back to the house and hang out while we waited until it was time to get dressed.  All the bridesmaids got dressed first so we would be ready to help Auntie!

This is me (mommy) at 25 weeks pregnant with you!  And below is Auntie waving goodbye to our house for the last time as a single woman.  When she returned the next day she was married!

Someone's going to the chapel and she's gonna get married!!!  While Auntie is beautiful every day - she looked simply stunning the actual day of her wedding - truly a beautiful bride!

This is Mommy and Katie.  Mommy used to babysit for Katie and Auntie on the weekends.  Katie got married in May.  It was fun to see them all dressed up and "grown up" and also sad because it made Mommy feel a little bit old :)

Mommy and Auntie - sisters through the good, the bad, and the ugly and friends for life!  I am very lucky to have a sister such as Auntie - she and Mommy are not super close in age (we are 6.5 years apart) but as we have grown up the gap in age has seemed smaller and smaller.  Auntie is truly a friend now and not just my baby sister.  She's an amazing auntie and I can't wait for you to meet her!

The newly married couple!  Apple, meet Uncle Jarrod!  He's got lots of brothers so I am sure he will help Mommy figure out what's brotherly "love/play" and what you and your brother should get in trouble for.  He takes great care of Auntie (and she of him).  Mommy especially likes some of the sacrifices he has made to keep himself and Auntie local for the sake of family!  Mommy isn't rushing them but can't wait for the day that we can take a BIG family vacation with them and your cousins!

These were the gold shoes that Mommy wore for the wedding (Mommy's feet have coral nail polish on the toes).  They hurt so badly that as soon as pictures were over I threw them and Grandpa Adam's car and said I never wanted to see them again!

And lastly, a picture of you with Mommy and Daddy.  You were a great wedding guest.  We danced the night away and had so much fun with our family.  Thank you for allowing me to enjoy Auntie's wedding as much as I did!

25 weeks

We wish Auntie and Uncle Jarrod a lifetime of happiness and thank them again for inviting us to be a special part of their day!

xoxo
Mommy

New England Aquarium

Dear Conor,

This summer we have made two trips to the New England Aquarium.  We certainly are getting a lot of use out of the family pass that Grandma and Grandpa Trayner gave you for Christmas (2012).  The first trip was on 7.2.13 with Auntie Cathlin.  You and she had a lot of fun and it was nice that Mommy got a little rest because Auntie loved walking around with you and you loved your time with her!

This was one of the last times that we got to spend with Auntie all by ourselves before she got married.  It was a fun day for all of us.  After the Aquarium you napped in the car while Auntie and I had a picnic of Panera.  Then it was off to the dress shop for fittings!!!  Hard to believe that as I type this now Auntie is married and has a new home!  Thanks for a GREAT day Auntie!

Your second trip to the Aquarium was when we met up with Grandpa and Grandma Trayner (and Danielle) to bring Auntie Sarah back to them on 7.27.13.  Again, it was a great day with family and you had so much fun being with your family that Mom got a lot of rest.  You held everyone's hands but mine and spent time with each person.  We got lunch at Faneuil Hall and then walked around the waterfront before it was time to head back home.

Looking for the BIG turtle

Holding the side of the stroller like Grandpa taught you

Mommy, Conor, Auntie Danielle (& Baby Brother - 26 weeks)

Daddy didn't get to go to the Aquarium so we have to plan another trip or two so that he is able to see the new tank and spend some time in Boston with you!  Maybe next time we can bring Little Gordon and his parents!

xoxo
Mommy

Emotions Running on Overload

Oh Boy!

They say when you are pregnant you can become emotional at the drop of a hat or that you are more emotional than when you are not.  Well, pregnant or not - this week I have been very emotional.  This is a very busy summer for our family with so many BIG events that its hard not to want to simply freeze time.

Last night I listened to Conor breath as I rocked him to sleep - one chubby arm behnd me and the other ending with his little chubby hand resting on my chest.  As I watched his face relax into rest I saw how much he has truly become my little man and it made me so sad to realize that our nights of rocking until either he or I were ready to be done are slowly coming to and end.  Pretty soon there will be another little being craving my attention and so I am savoring these precious moments.  Josh is an amazing father and we truly share Conor-care but nighttime has always been a Conor/Mommy thing (this might have to do with the fact that I breastfeed and Conor still nurses before bed).  I find myself looking forward to those quiet minutes together as he drifts off to sleep in the dark room.  Last night I held you a little longer Con-man because I just couldn't let you go......

This weekend we will be driving to celebrate Danielle's graduation.  I was fifteen when she was born and 1/2 way through my freshman year of high school.  I can't fathom that the time has come for her to walk across the stage and in a few short months take those first steps into her dorm - her first "first" apartment if you will.  I feel a sense of pride over the amazing young woman she has become but I also feel as though time has flown by and am sad that she will spend the next few years growing apart from us before entering adulthood and coming back full circle to return to her family as she builds her own.  Thank goodness I am not the one bringing her to college as I'm not sure I could keep back the tears!

And then there is Cathlin - my first baby sister.  The one that I was so excited to have, the one that I probably tried to protect too much when she was little but who I also pushed away at times when I just wanted my own space and wanted her to stop copying me!  In forty-four days she will be a wife.

 Phew - just thinking about all these moments that have yet to come but will soon be memories brings tears to my eyes!  I don't know how my parents are holding it together this summer but life is built on memories and I am thankful that this summer there will be so many beautiful ones!

xoxo
Erin

Chinese Food and Cookies for Santa

Dear Conor,

After brunch with the Jakan Grandparents it was time to jump in the car and drive down to the Cape to get ready for Santa!

We arrived just in time for our annual Chinese food dinner.  Everyone got to go - except  Grandpa Adam but we made a special plate just for him!  The food was yummy and despite it having been a long day and the restaurant being full with a lot of stimulation you did really well!  Cousin Nolan also did really well and it was so much fun to have both you boys this year for Christmas!

After dinner we went back to the house and we let you open one present.  You opened a pair of Christmas jammies!  Mommy helped you get dressed in them and get ready for bed and then there was only one thing left to do.....leave some cookies out for Santa!

Cookies for Santa

Family Picture - Christmas 2012

Hey Santa - these are for you!

 

First Ever Christmas Cookie!  The official Santa Cookie Taste Tester!

After you went to sleep Conor I took a picture of Grandma's tree all decorated and light up just waiting for Santa!

Before Santa

Then, when you woke up early in the morning and Mommy needed to go downstairs and get some extra wipes Mommy saw that Santa had come!  So I took a picture with all the lights off - I didn't want to peek at what Santa had brought until everyone else was awake!

Clearly everyone had been good this past year because Santa not only came but he piled lots of presents under the tree!

Merry Christmas Eve!

xoxo
Mommy

Saying Goodbye & a Nice Ride

Dear Conor,

The time has come for you to say goodbye to a friend for the first time.  Your friend Addilyn has to move away with her Mommy and Daddy because her Daddy got a new job.  She had a big early birthday celebration but I wasn't able to bring you because of work so on December 21, 2012 we went over to their house for a special visit!

A's mom set up an adorable space for A to get pictures with all her friends - you certainly hammed it up for the camera!

It was very hard to say goodbye but we were promised that Addilyn and her family would come back for a visit and when they do we are all going to get together!  Plus, we can keep in touch via FaceBook so it's not like we will never get to chat or watch A grow up!

When we got home from Addilyn's house I put together your Police Car.  It went together pretty easily and you couldn't WAIT for it to be done.  You stood at the gate to the bathroom the entire time I was putting it together.

Driving with Daddy

Stop - your under arrest!

Oh no!  Santa's in trouble!

I can see you enjoying this car for many years to come - we are going to let you keep it inside until spring and then it will become an outside toy :).

xoxo
Mommy

Birthday - Part 2

Dear Conor,

We made it!!  It's party time!!  The date of your birthday party officially arrived!!  I was so excited - your Daddy was so excited - your grandparents were so excited.....everyone couldn't wait to celebrate the last amazing year we have all had with you!

Your party was Whale Themed (It's been a Whaley Great Year) and so I bought some basic blue hats and with my cricut I cut out whales and some number "1s" and added them to the hats.  They didn't look quite finished so I added little white pom-poms to the top.  Your hat also got a ring of pom-poms at the bottom!

Hats and Noise makers!

Entry Table - signing mat, hats, noise makers

 To the side of the entry table was the food table.  It had so many yummy things on it.  Amanda and Goddad Chris brought a lasagna, tuna fish sandwiches, there were cookies from Sue, a fresh fruit salad, chips from the Smith Family, salsa, goldfish, and cupcakes.  The food was a huge hit and there was barely anything left over!

On the opposite side of the room was the "Guess how Old I am Game"  It took up both bulletin boards and Grandma Mary decorated them so nicely! 

On the shelf above the food table was your cake.  I worked really hard to make it just right for you.  I made several whales and this was the best one.  It was very very very hard to make a whale from fondant and while it wasn't perfect it was the best Mommy could do!

We also set up a gift table and put one of the whale pinatas on the table to decorate it.  This one was full of tasty treats for you and your friends to open later during your party.  We also put your little favors for your friends on this table so they were part decoration that were actually your "take-aways"

Gift Table

 Between the two bulletin boards was your high chair which was set up for taking your smash pictures.  I couldn't believe how nicely the paper matched your chair - that was not planed!.

There were tables set up for people to sit at and tissue paper pom-poms hanging from the ceiling lights to decorate the room and make it feel a bit like you were "under the water".  I also brought some of your toys down for everyone to play with.  I brought your ball pit, your bead maze, walking toys, and some other small things.  You did a great job sharing your toys with your friends and your ball pit was a huge source of fun for everyone!

The first guests to arrive were your BFF Gordon and your cousin Nolan.  Gordon and you enjoyed spending time alone in your pit and you were having so much fun that cousin Nolan just had to join in on the fun!

Because he is still little his Mom and Daddy helped him stick his little feet in it.  Nolan wasn't too sure about being 100% in the ball pit but he did like holding them so we gave him on to play with outside of the pit!

Slowly your friends all started arriving and you were so happy to see them all!

Playing with Auntie Cathline

Carter, Neve, Sophie & Ryan

Neve

Charlie

Sophie

Sharing whales with Neve

Lots of Friends!

 After everyone played and had a chance to eat it was time to smash the cake!  Oh Conor - you were so funny!  Your fingers touched the frosting and you immediately started crying.  You did not like how sticky it was and you did NOT like it on your hands!  You kept trying to push the cake off your high chair tray.

Waiting for your cake

Happy Birthday Conor

Taking off the whale.

After the whale came off the cake and some of the frosting got on your hands and arms you started melting down, begging to be removed from the chair.  Miss Sharon was taking pictures for Mommy and she (thankfully) didn't take those pictures - it certainly isn't how we want everyone to remember your day.

After everyone left your party we tried to offer you the cake again to see if there was just too much going on for you the first time.  This time it was just Mommy and Daddy (with Auntie taking pictures).  Here's how that attempt turned out:

Still not sure about this cake thing!

Nope - not in love with it

Get me outta here!

Priceless.....

It's okay that you didn't like your cake Conor (even though Mommy worked really hard on it) because it isn't about the cake but about the special day that we got to spend with you.  Maybe next year you will want to try a bit of cake:)

We also opened your gifts at your party.  Mommy had a great idea to take pictures of the gift giver, you and the gift so that it would be easy to remember for thank-you cards.  You are very fortunate to have so many generous friends and family who not only came out to your party a week before Christmas but also brought you a gift to commemorate your first year.  Here are a few of Mommy's favorite photos:

Auntie Cathlin got you Instruments!

Loving the Tissue Paper from Neve's present

Braden got you fun books!

GodDad Chris wants you to love the Bruins like he does!

It was an amazing party little man but there was still one more activity to do before all your friends left - break the pinata open!  Since you guys are little we got a pinata that you pull ribbons to open it up rather than hit it with a stick.  It was very hard because the ribbons didn't open it up very easily but with a little help from Mommy and Daddy it opened and all the yummy treats came out (Annie's goldfish in green bags).

That's it Conor - that's your birthday in a nutshell!  Of course there were many pictures taken that didn't so stay tuned for a Grandparent's post!

xoxo
Mommy